Anonymous said: Hey John, I've been in a relationship for just over a year, but my boyfriend is kinda not making me feel loved anymore and we fight a lot. I thought about breaking up with him, so I could get something started with this other guy I work with who I have a huge crush on. He makes me feel special and I dream about him when I am sleeping. But now he got into a relationship, too. What should I do?
I think if you’re going to break up with your boyfriend it shouldn’t be for the purpose of being able to immediately jump into another relationship (or to start talking to someone else) to begin with. First of all it’s hurtful to him and I imagine you care about him to some extent to not want to twist the knife, and second of all that’s really messy when it comes to your own emotions. I feel like you should start dating someone without any lingering thoughts of another person (and again, I’m assuming you care about your boyfriend so you do have feelings for him in some way.)
If you think it’s worth working through then you should talk it out, but if you’re already thinking about how great it would be to be with someone else I don’t see why you should stay together. Don’t stay with someone for convenience, or for their benefit. It sounds like you’ve already close to moved on.